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A mouthful of words…

Is it cathartic to bare your soul?

Is there an up-tick from sharing the whole?

When demons are gathered does it help to slay?

Or are angels and demons best kept away?


I struggle for answers and find there are none.

I look at the questions and there is just one.

Does word-play heal and replenish my mind?

Is this a tangle it pays to unwind?


I shrink back from people, in silence withdraw;

I call it a strength what is deemed as a flaw.

I know as I buckle, it’s too much to bear-

but public is laughter, and lonely the tear.


About hbhatnagar

I need to fill this up with much better content than I had populated it with earlier. Why I write a blog maybe? I started blogging in 2009 or thereabouts. I was a newly turned atheist and wanted to converse with others of the same persuasion. We're not exactly a big population group in India! It didn't go very well and I sort of lost interest, posting a few things now and then. I got a lot more regular over the last few months and have been posting almost daily since February '15. I was, and am suffering from depression and things had gotten out of control. I had chronicled it in my posts, but I have removed them. Not because I wanted to hide that facet of my life; if that were the case, I wouldn't be writing this. But I was lucky to come across many, many wonderful people out here who helped me. Even if it was just to post and tell me I wasn't alone. I can't tell you how thankful I am for all of you. I've tried since, to tell my own story as an attempt at catharsis (didn't work) and as a means of telling others that they weren't alone either, not in their depression, nor in their cutting or burning, nor in their thoughts of and attempts at suicide. So this blog has taken shape, being at different points in time my showcase, my comedy club, my art gallery, my book club, my therapist, my close friend, my innermost dark self....but always my little corner of the world. You are all welcome to visit and I hope you stay awhile! A few points about me because I don't want to lead anyone on. I'm Indian, the brown-skinned variety; if race, ethnicity or skin colour is an issue, you don't have to get to know me any more than what you see on my blog. I'm 40, so if age is an issue, please be informed accordingly. I was a doctor, an ophthalmic surgeon for 10 years before I quit practice. I am a depressive, have been for some time, so some things do trigger me for no rhyme or reason; I don't expect anyone to understand that this happens, just maybe accept that it does. If not, I am sorry.


8 thoughts on “A mouthful of words…

  1. … and lonely the tear, said it all.
    So beautiful, yet so sad…

    Liked by 1 person

    Posted by Amy | 21/02/2017, 8:06 AM
  2. Thanks for Reply, Nirav8837 here

    Liked by 1 person

    Posted by nirav8837 | 20/02/2017, 3:33 PM
  3. Nice and Expressive enough.

    Liked by 1 person

    Posted by nirav8837 | 20/02/2017, 2:44 PM
  4. Thank you for the link-up.


    Posted by hbhatnagar | 01/04/2017, 7:53 AM


  1. Pingback: Depression: Tired | odd little rants - 01/04/2017

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