Thank you Amy, for reaching out, wondering why I was gone from this space for so long. It’s been another time of inner turmoil, and I have not reached a shore yet; perhaps I never will. But that’s besides the point. I had reduced my personal portion of my blogs: it’s been some time since I talked about myself.
Storms have gathered, departed, burst, washed away; I have weathered them all, in one way or another. Legal tangles, a second job, emotional upheavals, tiredness, frustration, anger, pain, numbness – the reasons are many. Foremost might be a sullen stubborn pride, belatedly revived that keeps me stone. I’m not sure if pride is the correct word, pride presumes a certain joy, a satisfaction at having been kept; I have no such. It’s just this dying will to not show myself as weak as I did, so many times before. I know I have slipped from this path but I strive to keep to it. Never again.
Did I hear someone say, “Not again!”?